Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
