she looked like the before picture.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize