I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize