Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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