dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Randomize
