I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
