don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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