Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
