Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
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