I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
