You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
