i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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