too bad you live with your parents still
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
