I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
