You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
