She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
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