I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Randomize
