i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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