You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
i out mim tonsoeep
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