If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
