I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Randomize
