the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
