Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
