My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
smell my finger.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
