if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
