8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Did you pee in the oven last night??
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
