Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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