she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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