Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
