yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
