Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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