I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize