i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
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