I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
