Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
