Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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