everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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