So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
this will be a night to untag.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Randomize
