Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Randomize
