chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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