2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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