It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
