Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
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