do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Randomize
