let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
