you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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