i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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