wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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