Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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