drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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